inspiration

So I have a confession... I am more than a little bit absent minded and testimony to that is the fact that I managed to forget my password for this blog :P I'm such a fail, I actually despair sometimes, I really do live in the clouds :) So my last blog was a while ago, and its been interesting to read what I wrote... not much has really changed,  I still need to focus more and think about what I really want. 

 Our sexy irish lecturer told us about honours this morning.... it sounds quite scary, I'm struggling with some of the theoretical stuff we're doing this year which is extended in the honours program next year! I have to write a thesis as well... eeeekkkkkkkk, oh well will have to see how it all works out. I have been meaning to paint for a while now, I just got back from a 4 week trip to zambia, botswana and namibia with Greg and his family. I had a lovely time, although it was a bit too long towards the end, I missed my own family and friends! Greg and I are closer than ever though I still think I need a bit of time apart to do the things I need to do. Sigh. Growing up is hard and complicated. On the one hand I have people asking me if I'm older than 16, on the other hand I got mistaken for the mother of a six year old the other day, terrifying thought! I feel in between at the moment, like I am firmly stuck in the present but looking to the future all the time. I still strongly believe God has a plan for my life, and that everything happens for a reason, in my mind there's no such thing as a coincidence. Luckily I have beautiful friends who are going through similiar feelings to me, who never seem to grow tired of my rants, fears, groans and growls :) I want to paint a picture, I'm just waiting for inspiration, thats the problem I think, I'm always waiting for some sort of epiphany, I need to search for it instead.