once upon a time there was a little girl with yellow hair and she was a cloud gazer and a believer and played mary in the church play and a shepherd once as well and one day at church everyone started to have miracles happening to them the church was full of people with teeth that suddenly changed to gold and silver and hands covered in gold glitter that wouldn't come off no matter how many times you scrubbed them and the little girl prayed and prayed for gold hands she checked her palms every minute and once she saw some flecks of glitter there but it turned out to be from her sparkly pen and she sat in worship one day and screwed her eyes up tight praying with all her little heart and she opened one eye secretly in case the priest was watching to check one lonely little palm but there was no glitter and now its 13 years later and she's still checking but theres no glitter so she's stopped praying well sort of because in some quiet corner of a heart that taken up mostly by herself she still names herself a believer and she still prays sometimes and waits but theres no glitter. no glitter at all. and sometimes it makes her cry but she pretends she doesn't care isn't she good enough maybe not.